Amputated Moon

poetry, nature, writing (all writing is the property of the writer and should be considerd copywritten)

Jul 7

A Traveler’s Question

Category: My Poetry 
stone and wooden door2
knocking on the moonlit door
waiting for an answer
weary from walking the road
the traveler asks
is anybody there?

only a moment
here on a doorstep
a short pause
within a journey
there is no answer

simply a knock
echoing sharply
within an empty house
a breath caught and held
hope caught in his throat

time has stopped
the earth hangs still
rotation halts
the knock still waits
for answering footsteps

silence breaks through
windows and door
time begins again
the traveler turns
and goes

Pamela Olson, 7/7/09

For Carry on Tuesday's prompt:
"Is there anybody there?" said the Traveller, knocking on the moonlit  
door from "The Listeners" by Walter de la Mare.
10 comments

10 Comments so far

  1. lissa July 7th, 2009 5:44 pm

    there’s this atmosphere to it that reminds me of Robert Frost’s, a road less travel, very calm and yet very urgent somehow, love how it holds just that moment of waiting and then leaving, wonderful piece

  2. Melissa July 7th, 2009 6:52 pm

    I think of the tragedy of the unanswered door. What was the traveler wanting, love, forgiveness, redemption or a chance.

    Very nice.

  3. Michelle Johnson July 7th, 2009 7:26 pm

    There’s a sadness that hinges on my heart when I read this because the knocker didn’t get an answer on the other side of the door. What was he wanting, I wonder. This is beautifully written. Hope all is well. Have a great night.

  4. The Dark Lord July 7th, 2009 9:54 pm

    WOW! That got me speechless..
    Despite the regular incidence, the poem creats an enchanting ambience.. and showers the reader with a whole horde of emotions.. Indeed, to the traveler, the one unremarkable incident became so poignant at that singularly pulsating moment.. which you described stunningly well, and with superb imagery!

  5. Anthony North July 8th, 2009 1:20 am

    Cleverly done and very well written. The sadness you deliver from a simple act is poignant.

  6. Old Grizz July 8th, 2009 6:54 am

    How many doors have we all knocked on? Never to see them open. Is that good or bad? twist of fate are always interesting. nice writing

  7. vic July 8th, 2009 2:14 pm

    Nice piece. Makes you think. Thanks for sharing.

  8. JanePoet ~ JP/deb July 8th, 2009 10:46 pm

    That moment of stopping time … you’ve captured it so well.

    Peace,
    JP/deb

  9. Dee July 10th, 2009 1:50 pm

    sad for the person who didn’t answer the door – maybe a missed opportunity?

  10. D! July 18th, 2009 4:43 am

    super, as i have walked so many roads, going to so many places but one, finsing myself in so many situation but one, i love it…

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