Vampire Lament
Sep 8th, 2008 | By Rick | Category: News & Comment
Sookie and Bill the vampire
I was looking forward to Alan Ball’s new HBO vampire series True Blood. I liked his script for American Beauty and loved Six Feet Under, his last effort for the network. Unfortunately, I have to say it was a disappointment. It was like, how many southern stereotypes can you pack into one hour-long episode? Let’s see … there’s the gay black bartender, who not only works on a road gang but sho’ nuff makes the portly cracker at the bar really nervous ’cause — get it? — he’s gay and black, and it’s the South. Or the drippin’ with honey grandma who gets excited at the prospect that the new bloodsucker in town — who’s name is Bill — might be old enough to remember the Civil War. She wants him to come and speak to her Daughters of Confederate Something-or-another chapter at the library. At a night meeting, of course.
Vampires aren’t what they used to be, that’s for sure. Bill looks like a pasty-faced refugee from an emo festival, and it’s no longer necessary to drink human blood: there’s a synthetic version that you can get in six packs at the local stop n’ shop. And Bill is such a wuss that a couple of crackers can take him down with just the flimsiest of silver chains.
Oh, my beloved genre!
Well, at least I can revisit my troubled past through the miracle of photographs . . .
Follow the jump for more vampires.
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“I don’t watch that much TV and I especially watch virtually no TV as it come on TV…”
“Graham”
“Well,…Hello! Graham,
Personally, I hope to become a “Netflix” Kind of “Chick” myself!… Television?!? What is Television?…Oh! something that is a “portal” for all of my films on dvds.
Oops!… is this a “rerun” or a “repeat” for me!”
“Shocker” :O “my” own!…quote!… from Graham, eBloggerspot page.
My opinion about television programs remains the same especially, after reading your “synopsis” for the HBO series “TrueBlood.”…Now when it comes to who is my favorite “vampire”…It’s almost a ‘tie’ because I like actor Bela Lugosi, portrayal of “Dracula” in the 1931 film and I also enjoyed watching actor Gary Oldman portrayal of the “neck biter” in Coppola’s version of “Dracula.” So, who would I choose as my first choice?..Well, …all I can say is they are… “neck” in “neck!”..ohh!…
Rick,…Would you say that the lady in the 5th photograph need to call 1-800 Denti…
Tks,
darkcitydame,
Who’s Graham?
And she does seem to be in dire need of orthodontia.
I was curious about this, since I also liked Ball’s work on “American Beauty” and especially, “Six Feet Under.” But, alas, I cancelled my HBO subscription after “The Sopranos” folded. Your review makes me feel a little better, though - sounds like I’m not missing much.
(And may I just add that Frank Langella was a real hottie in his Dracula days! Thanks for including that pic.)
Pat,
HBO TV and movies have gone badly downhill. I’m thinking we could do without it as well.
And your welcome on the Langella …
I have the pilot queued up to watch, but your vicious pan has me more in the mood for Dreyer’s Vampyr and the vastly underrated Shadow of the Vampire.
Your mileage may vary, of course, but it wasn’t just he over-the-top “southern” that got me going … I thought the exposition was clunky, the direction and editing only so-so … part of the problem is that it is first episode, and there’s a whole lot of introducing that has to be done in one of those.
Of course, Dreyer’s film is great, and I really like Shadow as well. I had a pic from it to put in the line-up. There. It’s in there now.
Ahh!..Rick,
Thanks, for adding the pictures of two of my favorite
Vampire flicks. Merhige’s “Shadow of the Vampire” starring Malkovich and Dafoe doing his “turn” as “Schreck.”
And Ryder along with Oldman doing his “turn” as Dracula.
Tks,
Ah, wonderful post. I, too, have been very disappointed in recent TV efforts on the vampire front–what’s that one on CBS? Kind of, um, anemic.)
I do have one bone to pick with you. You really need to put up pictures of the vamps from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Angel, Spike, Darla, The Master–all great vamps!
DarkCityDame,
You’re welcome.
Marilyn,
There’s a vampire show on CBS?
And how could I forget Buffy?
I got my vampire fix as a young junior high schooler with DARK SHADOWS and that irresistable bi-polar vampire, Barnabus Collins, played by the lovable Canadien actor Jonathan Frid, and the woman who never stopped loving him, Dr. Julian Hoffmann, played by Grayson Hall.
But, you are right to display Max Shreck’s photo, (and Lee’s and Oldman’s) as he was the forerunner, (and still) the scariest of all vampires. But Christopher Lee (HORROR OF DRACULA) and Gary Oldman (BRAM STOKER’S DRACULA) rank high as well as Boris Karloff as an aging Wertalak in the shuddery last segment of Mario Bava’s atmospheric Italian entry BLACK SABBATH.
Sorry this HBO series is a bust.
You know, Sam, I’d forgotten Barnabas Collins … I enjoyed him as well.
But I actually prefer Herzog’s remake of Nosferatu to the original. Silly me.
I’ll have to see Herzog’s Nosferatu again. I saw it in 82 or 83 and didn’t particularly like it but hey, that was 25 years ago. I love the original because I love movies of the twenties and thirties, their look and feel. One of my problems (based on 25 years ago) was I got no sense of heavy atmosphere from it, no creeping dread. It seemed too brightly lit but again, all these memories are clouded. I’m going to give it another go.
Jonathan, I think Herzog’s was more “production-designed” than the original, if that makes sense. More detailed, rich. And of course, it’s in color.
As a vampire fan, how do you feel about the impending Twilight, Rick? I’m not exactly the target audience for it, but I’m curious to hear what others think, to the extent they care at all.
It took me a long time to warm up to Six Feet Under and it only happened when I could sit down and watch it on DVD all at once.
Sometimes shows take a few episodes to find their footing. Perhaps you’ll warm up to this one.
Craig, if you’re not the target audience for Twilight, then I’m certainly not. I’m kind of a fan of old school vamps, you understand, not that they have to be male and talk like Bela Lugosi, but the moral ambiguity of the modern ones, the kind of whiny, therapy-generation hand-wringing, like … “I’m ok even though I’m a soul-draining bloodsucker and I need you to understand that” kind of thing isn’t exactly to my liking.
Which doesn’t mean I won’t see “Twilight,” and you’re right: maybe “True Blood” will grow on me. As I told my wife as we were watching, “I sure hope it gets better.”
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